REAL HOUSEWIVES OF ORANGE COUNTY – 4/18/12

Why hello! Hope your taxes are filed and your accountant taking the day off. Especially if your accountant is you.

Breaking news! Just this very second!

· Sheree Whitfield is officially leaving RHOA! She is claiming she decided to leave of her own accord, but “sources” are of course reporting that Sheree was fired for demanding money and being boring. Rule of Housewifery #7: If you are going to demand money you sure as hell better not be boring. I will always be fond of Sheree for having brought the phrase “Who gonna check me, Boo?” to my life. Note to self: test on children during next squabble.
· Also down in ATL, NeNe is officially divorced from Gregg. (Odd that the only two people I know named Gregg with two G’s are both from Atlanta.) This was somewhat of an unexpectedly final development as she’s apparently been hinting on the show and in twits that it all may not be over between herself and Mr. Leakes. But alas.
· Taylor supposedly found out a few days ago via RadarOnline that she is being “phased out” in season 3 of RHOBH. The producers apparently felt that her awkward circumstances would have made it even more awkward to summarily drop her, so they are going to marginalize her to FOH status and perhaps even let that slip away at some point. Taylor is said to be in a panic because she has no other source of income (direct salary and promotional opportunities that derive from the show).
· Taylor’s “friends” have also told RadarOnline that the fear of losing the Housewives gig is leading her to drink more, and they think she should go to rehab. I’ll say this about Taylor, she knows how to pick ‘em.
· Tamra tweeted all weekend about picking out wedding rings with Eddie. He wants a black one; she thinks he should get black diamonds but he isn’t the diamond type. I know who is, and more on that later!
· Also in California, Bravo is apparently casting a new variation on the Housewives featuring a bunch of devout Christians from Calabasas. More Alexii? Isn’t one enough?
· In New York, Ramona is telling tabloids that she thinks another Housewife who may or may not be Aviva Drescher is “possessed” (rich, that, considering), and LuAnn’s boyfriend Pepe Le Peu is dropping hints that they would really love to have their own wedding-related spinoff akin to the Zolciak-Biermanns’ upcoming side-boob showcase.
· And finally, Caroline Manzo is experiencing The Change. (That’s the biggest news coming out of New Jersey. Snore.)

Let’s hop to it, lollipops!