Inside, Gretch is shouting about how Lex has done nothing but dish out this same kind of behavior (e.g., San Francisco) and yet she can’t take it herself. We are offered a shot of the San Francisco Vicki Intervention to remind us what Gretch is talking about and the big takeaway for me is that Gretch has totally done something to her lips. She used to have much thinner lips with a really sharp “V” in the bow and now they are inflated beyond reason. You can’t lay that all on lip gloss, girl. Heather attempts to point out that Tammy’s lack of a “filter” could be fueling some of the fire here, and Tammy’s having none of that, lady fancypants! In fact, if anything she thinks Vic is the sh*tstirrer – and if that’s the case, Gretch demands to know, why isn’t Tammy like head-spinningly, hair-pullingly, eye-poppingly furious at Vic for bringing Lex in the first case? Is anyone beside me starting to think Gretch is getting the ugly edit this season? So far it’s not looking good for ol’ Gretch. Sure enough, Gretch and Vic are now calling each other “stupid”. I feel stupid for watching this stuff.
Outside, PL and Lex are having a heart-to-heart, or should it more accurately be said that PL’s little face is about to go motorboating against their will. She looks nervous. Should they go in and get Vic? Should they leave without her? Lydia is ready to get the hell out of here, but Vic is “trying to stay neutral” and calm things down, because she’s always such a voice of reason, such an elder stateswoman. Lex doesn’t like the idea of shutting this fracas down one bit and is now in the limo weeping because Vic didn’t chase her down and confess her undying allegiance; all after Lex put herself through this horrifying bullying experience JUST for Vic’s sake. And screen time.
Tammy now decides to go outside. Oh sweet Jesus El Hombre why, why? She ends up eavesdropping on the limo conversation in which Lex shares that she has been so traumatized by her interactions with the other ‘Wives that she had to go on Xanax. Tammy pops up in the doorway and Vic gives us her Shocked Squirrel face. Now really, Tammy quietly asks, if you are so traumatized by your interactions with us, do you keep coming around? Why indeed. Oh, we all know why. Lydia remains firm with Lex that while no one is being nice to her, “bullying” is not the right term for what’s happening here. Lex is going into her delusional bullshit place and Tammy has had enough, so she tells her to “go home and be bullied there,” and stalks off. Ooooh, burn!
Back in the pink palace, Tammy tells her remaining guests that out in the limo Lydia was taking the “not bullying” side, which Tammy interprets as “standing up for us”. I think that’s a loose interpretation, but whatever. Puberty Lydia is now officially in the middle. It’s now midnight, and PL and Vic are definitely leaving. But not taking sides. Vic does tell Tammy that as far as she is concerned the two of them have “broken up”. Tammy thinks they are just having the usual friendly disagreement; Vic thinks it’s ridiculous for Tammy to think she can just unload and expect everyone to resume normal thereafter. Tammy accuses Vic of “supporting the bully word” and tells her to leave. Then gives her the finger. I am so tired of this conversation. Tammy does have an anger problem. Lex needs to find some new friends, preferably ones who don’t have a television show. Vic needs to retire. The psychic arrives and Heather thinks they need to step it up to an exorcist. They really do have exorcists, you know; my dad found it terribly amusing when the diocese’s exorcist was assigned to our home parish for a while. During every sermon he’d lean and whisper to me “that’s the exorcist!” It’s supposed to be a secret but somehow he found out. Rough line of work, I’d say.